May 16, 2008
This is real,
isn't it?
I think so, but I'm not sure how I feel about it yet.
"Kind of icky" comes close, though.
And to think I cried real, actual, preteen-tears when I read that Joey McIntyre wouldn't date somebody who was younger than he was.
Yeah, "icky" works.
I think so, but I'm not sure how I feel about it yet.
"Kind of icky" comes close, though.
And to think I cried real, actual, preteen-tears when I read that Joey McIntyre wouldn't date somebody who was younger than he was.
Yeah, "icky" works.
May 08, 2008
media blitz
May 02, 2008
A List *Amended!
I have a list of things to do that should have been finished already.
Those things include: paying people back the money that I owe them (I just got a second job, so bear with me until next week, okay?), cleaning up after myself (Seriously on the list. I suck.), and emailing certain things to certain people who are waiting for me to do it. Stupid easy, of course.
You want to know what I'm doing, though? Aside from typing this and trying (sadly) to listen to "Everybody Loves Raymond" reruns happening one room over, I'm coming up with another list. *Amendment: And now I'm amending that list.
A List of Funny things to Say:
1. "I'm really good at blogging."
2. "Dunch," or "Linner." (In the case of having one more meal after breakfast in a day and it happens to fall in the late afternoon or evening. Sad.)
3. "Where's my shotgun?" *Amendment: this is only contextually funny. See below.
Example A: FRIEND #1 - "Hey friend! I'm afraid I'm going to be 5 to 8 minutes late for our coffee date. Are you mad?"
FRIEND #2 - "Where's my shotgun?"
Example B: CHILD - "Oooooh! I hear the ice cream truck!"
PARENT/GUARDIAN - "Where's my shotgun?"
(You don't even need to raise your voice or anything, because the word "shotgun" takes care of it.)
4. "Well, give me a brick." *Amendment: This isn't funny.
5. "Quit it, Pony." *Amendment: This is only funny OUT of context. There is no good example.
6. Dick Hyman. (Not classy of me, I know, but it's also not my fault.)
7. "I'm regionally famous." Only when it isn't true. If it's true, it's funnier to say "I've never been here before!" or "What do you call this region again?"
*Note: This differs from the statement "I'm regionally infamous." That's not very funny.
8. "I have a full tank." (Not the kind of full tank of gas that would cost a lot of money; the kind that would de-friend me.) *Amendment: This is only funny over the phone and I'm only guessing because I'm a lady and I don't know a thing about farting.
*Note: That amendment was funny because I made a joke about not farting so that I could say, in a round about way, that I DO actually fart and that it's weird when people pretend they don't. But I could have just left it alone and you would never have put two and two together. It's also funny (I can't stop) that I felt the need to go on so far with this. It's almost like I'm proud of passing gas. This is really funny!
9. "I'm writing a list of funny things to say." *Amendment: I couldn't stop at 8. No one does that and it's not funny to try either.
*Another Amendment: It's also not funny that I stopped at 9, but 10 was terrible. Trust me.
Doesn't anyone want to hang out with me anymore? That doesn't make the list because it makes me sad a little.
But seriously, do you want to go for a coffee or something? Note: It would probably get a chuckle if I added "Don't be late, though!" eluding to Example A. But it really isn't funny. It's probably more funny that I'm talking about it instead of leaving it as a "wink, wink" sort of thing.
I love you, Liza
Those things include: paying people back the money that I owe them (I just got a second job, so bear with me until next week, okay?), cleaning up after myself (Seriously on the list. I suck.), and emailing certain things to certain people who are waiting for me to do it. Stupid easy, of course.
You want to know what I'm doing, though? Aside from typing this and trying (sadly) to listen to "Everybody Loves Raymond" reruns happening one room over, I'm coming up with another list. *Amendment: And now I'm amending that list.
A List of Funny things to Say:
1. "I'm really good at blogging."
2. "Dunch," or "Linner." (In the case of having one more meal after breakfast in a day and it happens to fall in the late afternoon or evening. Sad.)
3. "Where's my shotgun?" *Amendment: this is only contextually funny. See below.
Example A: FRIEND #1 - "Hey friend! I'm afraid I'm going to be 5 to 8 minutes late for our coffee date. Are you mad?"
FRIEND #2 - "Where's my shotgun?"
Example B: CHILD - "Oooooh! I hear the ice cream truck!"
PARENT/GUARDIAN - "Where's my shotgun?"
(You don't even need to raise your voice or anything, because the word "shotgun" takes care of it.)
4. "Well, give me a brick." *Amendment: This isn't funny.
5. "Quit it, Pony." *Amendment: This is only funny OUT of context. There is no good example.
6. Dick Hyman. (Not classy of me, I know, but it's also not my fault.)
7. "I'm regionally famous." Only when it isn't true. If it's true, it's funnier to say "I've never been here before!" or "What do you call this region again?"
*Note: This differs from the statement "I'm regionally infamous." That's not very funny.
8. "I have a full tank." (Not the kind of full tank of gas that would cost a lot of money; the kind that would de-friend me.) *Amendment: This is only funny over the phone and I'm only guessing because I'm a lady and I don't know a thing about farting.
*Note: That amendment was funny because I made a joke about not farting so that I could say, in a round about way, that I DO actually fart and that it's weird when people pretend they don't. But I could have just left it alone and you would never have put two and two together. It's also funny (I can't stop) that I felt the need to go on so far with this. It's almost like I'm proud of passing gas. This is really funny!
9. "I'm writing a list of funny things to say." *Amendment: I couldn't stop at 8. No one does that and it's not funny to try either.
*Another Amendment: It's also not funny that I stopped at 9, but 10 was terrible. Trust me.
Doesn't anyone want to hang out with me anymore? That doesn't make the list because it makes me sad a little.
But seriously, do you want to go for a coffee or something? Note: It would probably get a chuckle if I added "Don't be late, though!" eluding to Example A. But it really isn't funny. It's probably more funny that I'm talking about it instead of leaving it as a "wink, wink" sort of thing.
I love you, Liza
Labels: I can be immature, random crud, stories
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