The News of Liza Kate

Make commercials for myself that are as inspiring as the commercials PBS makes for itself.

I would make some people slumped on the couch on a beautiful springy day feel bad about themselves and some other people would send me donations.

Labels: random crud

I have some ideas about where I've disappeared to and why. The following is a short list:

1. Winter left me sad and depressed.
2. This winter was sad and depressing.
3. Sadly, I was depressed this winter.
4. I was saddened with winter depression.
5. I was depressed by the sad winter.

I have a million things to share with both of you (as I'm sure my teeny-tiny readership may have jumped off of my sorry, little, dark ship of gloom a long time ago) but I will try to keep it brief.

1. I have not smoked in 72 days. This is huge.

I tried to quit smoking last May. I went through about one million nicotine patches, suffered through as many little circular rashes, and never really kicked the habit.

Then, smarty pants here decided to stop buying pouches of tobacco I rolled myself ($4.00/4 days) and start buying very fancy "natural" smokes ($6.00+/1.5 days) in order to teach myself some sort of lesson. I never learned it, but I did go kind of broke in the process. More on that later, though.

Finally, I said enough was enough (actually, I think it was more like "You know what? Fuck this shit!"), threw away a half a pack, searched for and destroyed any and all cigarette stuff, and that was that.

The first two weeks were weird: I was a jerk, my skin was crawling and my gums hurt, I had tunnel vision and could only think about smoking.

But now, I've got it pretty under control. No patches, no gum, no mystically magical tinctures from Ellwood's. I just really wanted to be done.

I was really ready.

Now, I'm only spending so much time on this quitting thing because it is the single most important thing I have ever and will ever do for myself. I'm not being preachy, I won't do that, but I know that for the first time ever that I can remember, I had an opportunity to improve my own lot, and I did it. I really did it and it's sticking.

I feel invincible and proud (which is something I do not throw around) and my whole life is possible.

Okay, moving on.

2. I'm writing songs again.

Some of you may remember me saying things like, "I HATE playing music!" or "I'm over this shit." It's true, I did and I was. I needed a break.

Now, I no longer say "yes" to every single show that is offered to me and it's catching on. I almost never get asked anymore.

I'm trying to play more and more infrequently - once a month tops - and lately, one of a couple of things have been happening:

- I open the show, which means that no one is really there yet (can the world have forgotten about me so soon? Jeez!)

- Or, the people putting the show on forget about it and leave town, or forget about it and give the night a pop guitarist who strums for the lord. Or is it "Lord?"

Anyhoo, that's all behind me now, kind of.

The next show will be on April 13th (Sunday) at The Camel, from 8pm-11pm with Charles Theodore and Mermaid Skeletons. It will rule you.

Oh, I'm opening so please, please come on time and show me that I'm not washed up or forgotten. It's kicking my ego in the groin, you know?

3. I got a photo studio.

Yup, for the next 4-5 months, I'll be subletting 1/2 of an amazing studio at a place that is quite coveted.

I'm very, very lucky and you will be hearing more about this later. Especially if you live in town and I like you. I'll probably want to make a picture with your face on it.

(a) I've been spending loads of time in the darkroom.

I really am very, very lucky. And grateful.

Somehow, just by knowing the right people(?), doing the right things(?), or some other reason I don't know about, I have almost endless access to probably one of the oldest darkrooms in Richmond.

It's dusty and chilly, a little bit creepy and probably home to several million crawling things, but I pretend it's mine when I'm down there. And I pretty much have it to myself. Lucky, lucky, lucky.

(b) I'm hoping to make the fruits of my labor visible to the rest of the world at a photo show sometime this summer. More about that later too.

4. I'm working on a screen play.

I know, what a dork, right?

Right. I am. But it is, kind of, all about dancing. And that makes it cool, right? eh.

That will be a summertime project, hopefully completed by the Fall.

These things are pretty slow moving, by the way - the photo show, the song writing, the script writing, the darkroom-ing.

For some really weird reason, I don't get paid to do the things I want to do just yet, so, unless I pick up an extra shift at work or find a second job, these projects are and will remain meagerly funded.

But jesus, I'm having the best time ever. Or is it "Jesus?" I never know.

I'll leave you now, with this:

Labels: friends, music, photography, smoking

I almost married this fool back when I was a fool.

He owes me money too, Louisianna.

Labels: I can be bitter, I can be immature